Sun, 27 August 2023
Highest weight - 460 I had lots of real feelngs, food kept me safe. I had skills, sought and achieved validation. but it was never enough. I had a way of pushing people way, and feel rejected. Food never rejected me. 2018 dangerous diabetic diagnosis.doubled up on food and medicine.Made since to me. 11/11/2020 arrived in OA and admitted I was powerless over food. Had negative side affects. Got a sponsor early on and went through the steps but still do step 1,2 and 3 every day. Every step was transformational the first time trough and still is. More is revealed every time I go through them. now know I have a multitude of characters defects which I work on AND characters assets which continue to grow. |
Sun, 20 August 2023
1st abstinence I lost over 200 lbs. Verbally and physically abusive upbringing. Food helped. Top weight over 400. 2 devastating losses brought me to my knees. My self talk was extremely negative until I started working the steps Still working on improving my relationship with a higher power. |
Sun, 13 August 2023
Thin untill High School Up to 350. Drugs were the only diet than helped until OA. After car accident 1983 I ended up in OA. I heard my story. Abstinent since 5/31/83 Initially I was reluctant because of the God stuff. Jumped into the steps I WANTED what you had. When my sponsor went out I moved to the middle of the herd. I realize now I was very angry my first 5 years. I hate the phrase 'More will be revealed' It is true and today I have twe steps to handle this new stuff. I talk the tools in and out of the program........ |
Sun, 6 August 2023
Missing first two minutes of recording. :( Dieted in college comparing myself to everyone else. First time I thought it was a problem. Going to Weight Watcher did not work as I was not willing to take directions and be different from my peers. Somehow I thought the larger I got the more invisible i became. Knowing I could eat in class was a gift from God. By the time I got to OA I was pretty beaten down. I could not fit in a booth etc. Could not keep lying to myself. In OA I saw the light in people eyes, They told a shameful truth and people clapped. I wanted that. Two parts of my abstinence.Temporal and substance. When and what I eat are different components for my recovery. once I decided I wanted what you had and became willing to go to any lengths it all kicked into gear. After a while my mind, my heart and my soul opened up and could receive the gifts of this program. |