Sun, 30 May 2021
Abstinent from 10/86
I was 10 when I got on my first diet from my mother worked for 5 days.
Food took me out of where I was, unsafe, and put me in a safe place.
My bravest moment was to stand, Indentify a compulsive overeater and in that moment I became 'a part of'.
It was a shock when I realized the world did not revolve around me.
I continue to improve my conscious contact with 'God'.
Sun, 23 May 2021
1st meeting 1988.
I knew what was the right way to eat but I could not refrain from binging/eating for any length of time.
Grew up in home with no structure.
Could not imagine talking about my food in front of men.
I got a sponsor,what she asked me to do made no sense but I did it anyway.
Discovering a higher power is an ongoing process for me. Recovery is in the seeking.
For me it has been a slow and consistent road of recovery. Like the tortoise.
Sun, 16 May 2021
Used Lunch money to buy candy on the way to school.
Hit 250 in high school.
Found OA in college, followed the program and.... it worked.
My relapse happens slowly, loosing one peice at at time until I was completely out of the program.
Gastric Bypass seemed like a miracle.... for a while.
The food blocked me from the joy of the American Dream.
From all out to all in was the beginning of my recovery..this time.
In the beginning, feelings seemed like negative byproduts of doing the work.
Really wanting and choosing a salad was a miracle of the program.
Sun, 9 May 2021
Graduated HS @ 270 with 50" waist. It frightened me.
Fear ruled me. I fixed/avoided with food.
I was willing to go to ANY lengths. Alone - Every diet work for a short time... Once.
46 days in OA led to my worst binge ever. It was a turning point.
I discovered a Higher Power of "MY" understanding.
Abstinence gave me lots of extra time to do my program.
Sun, 2 May 2021
Food was my crutch when I was 12.
Even pudgy brought about massive shame.
God was for uneducated, weak- willed people.
I attended meetings without participating until somebody actually talked to me.
Not a program of feeling, thinking, wanting... It is a program of action !