Sun, 26 February 2023
Top weight over 500 lbs in high school. Now around 195. I flucuated between 350 and 500 many times. Coming into OA I had a food plan AND I restricted. I started lying, the food and weight was coming back and I acknowledged I was in relapse. I eventually ended up praying, had a spiritual experience and the journey to recovery started for real. Rigorous honesty became a way of life as I made my amends. I still want more - That is my disease. But I don't act on it - That is my recovery. |
Sun, 19 February 2023
Cannot remember a time when I was not obsessed with food. Major disappointment when I realized my size was related to my food and thought it was my fault. Going away to college opened up all the doors. Top recorded weight was 236. now about 135. On my own I lost weight but was super unhealthy and the stress was still terrible. Why can't I control this? Came into OA realizing I was an alcoholic with food. Crazy for the first few moths, Then settled down as I did the steps. Some of the tools every day. |
Sun, 12 February 2023
No matter how long I have been in the program I need to be accountable for my food. I gained 110 Lbs in my last relapse which brought on a host of physical problems When I took my 1st compulsive bite 4 years ago it did not occur to me downhill path I would go down. I never stopped going to meetings or the OA birthday event. In a moment without my intention I jumped back in. got a sponsor and took direction against my will. Day by day I developed and improved a relationship with a higher power. . for REAL. Now I have 2 years. A ropes course became the metaphor for my not having and then reconnecting with my higher power. |
Sun, 5 February 2023
Joined OA In San Fernando Valley for a year. The premise ' I can do it in my own' did not work. My intellectual armor was the wall I kept banging into. Coming back to OA it was a spiritual focus on the steps and tools which relieved me of the bondage of self and made the difference for the long term. Our food plan is personal based on our PARTICULAR way of eating compulsively. |